Perfect World
by D-Channerz
Summary: In a perfect world, nothing would ever go wrong. But then he'd never be able to see the things that were most important. Humor, fluff


**Title: ****Perfect World  
Rating:** G  
**Warnings:** Possible OOCness, fluffiness  
**Author's Notes:** First fic in a while. I'm actually kind of proud of it. It's not very long, and it's virtually pointless. But I hope you enjoy it anyway!

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When he walked into the office that morning, he had a bit of a bounce in his step. And everyone noticed.

It wasn't that the sun was shining outside, or that the cherry blossoms were in full bloom- as usual. And it certainly wasn't because the Picture of Tardiness, Asato Tsuzuki, had actually walked in five minutes _before _his usual time. Which wasn't much, considering his usual time was at least twenty or thirty minutes after work was supposed to begin.

It would have probably been ten minutes earlier, had he not spilled orange juice down the front of his dress shirt earlier that morning. Not only did he have to change his clothes, but he had to hurry and drop the soiled shirt off at the cleaners. Hopefully he'd remember to go and pick it up later on.

When he entered the lounge for his usual cup of coffee and five pastries, he encountered a few of his co-workers standing near the coffee maker with the other desired area of conquest. Most of them hurried and grabbed what they could before he could reach the pretty pink box with all of its sweet contents, but Tsuzuki simply smiled at them and glanced down at what was left.

There was only one.

Which didn't make sense, seeing as he was FIVE minutes earlier than usual! Frowning, he grabbed the last measly chocolate donut and shuffled towards the exit of the lounge warily, completely forgetting about his coffee and not noticing the amused glances of everyone else behind him as they enjoyed their own breakfast treats. Terazuma was one of the onlookers, grinning in triumph. As Tsuzuki passed him on his way out the door, he heard him snicker. He tried ignoring him, but the snickering got louder. Where was Wakaba-chan when he needed her?

Tsuzuki shot him a glare, and Terazuma smirked as he messily took a bite out of his own jumbo jelly donut. The other shinigami could only seethe.

"Want some?"

"Not from you!"

"Heh heh. Stupid. Should have come earlier, you know."

There was nothing stopping him from blowing up the entire lounge area, really. But it was the principle of the thing. Did he really need his paycheck to get any smaller? Still glaring at Terazuma, he pushed past abruptly. He received the desired effect: Terazuma nearly dropped his treat to the floor. Unfortunately, he caught it, and managed to spurt quite a large amount of jelly right on the back of Tsuzuki's suit coat. Any observers who weren't already snickering at him were covering their mouths to quiet their laughter. They at least turned around to give him some dignity.

In a perfect world, Tsuzuki decided, they probably wouldn't have gotten _any _pastries. Tsuzuki would have shared if they had asked nicely, he was sure-- not with Terazuma, though.

-------

He encountered Tatsumi on the way to his office. The secretary did **not **look happy. Even with the kicked puppy look and the streams of tears, the other man simply would not let him off this time. He docked his pay, gave him a stack of paperwork, AND took his half eaten donut. And all of it was done with a smile. Tatsumi was so scary sometimes...

"Now Tsuzuki, what have I told you about..."

Tsuzuki simply stared. In a perfect world, he probably would have at least let him keep the donut. Because really, Tatsumi was so kind to him all the time anyway. Why would it be any different now?

But since it wasn't a perfect world, Tsuzuki had to resort to falling on the floor and attaching himself to his friend's leg. This was accompanied by loud howling and unyielding cries of, 'PLEEEEASE TATSUMIIIIIII!', of course. He was dragged mercilessly down the rest of the hallway, down the stairs, and back again before Tatsumi finally relented and gave back the now mangled ring of dough and went off to his own office, adjusting his glasses the whole way. Tsuzuki grinned like an idiot and crawled away, purposely ignoring the stack of papers he was leaving behind.

Now, had he actually been paying attention and thinking properly, he probably would have thought about turning the corner just a bit faster than he had. Because just when he'd had set his eyes on the familiar wooden door just down the hall, there came a raucous cry from behind, and he was promptly pulled to his feet and hauled away in the other direction.

-------

"Come on Watari, Hisoka's going to kill me! I need to go do my-"

"I know!"

"But Watari!"

"I know!"

"BUT-"

"Open wide!"

"MMMPH!"

"Good boy!"

Watari stepped back from his handiwork with a sigh of satisfaction and then glanced at his watch. The potion would begin to take affect very soon. 003 circled her master's head, hooting as if signaling a countdown. Tsuzuki was sitting on one of the operating tables, looking miserably down at his shoes and wondering just how he'd gotten talked into going through with this... again. The blonde scientist was so good at talking people into things though, it was hard to keep up.

Five minutes later, he was still contemplating this when he felt the sudden urge to vomit. In a perfect world, he'd have had ready access to the proper facilities. But he didn't.

Thankfully, Watari wasn't as quick to anger as most people, and merely handed the now violently sick shinigami a clean towel, and a cold glass of water. He also seemed rather giddy as he watched Tsuzuki finish emptying the contents of his stomach all over the pristine white floor of the lab, and he had to wonder why. 003 was even making odd hooting noises.

_Great. Even the bird is laughing at me? What are they going on about?_

But when Watari scurried over to the side and grabbed a mirror for him, he didn't have to wonder anymore. His screams echoed down the hallway, and no one so much as batted an eyelash.

------

By the time Tsuzuki had managed to make it to his office, he was feeling rather, well, _crappy_. Any other words that came to mind were simply inappropriate.

He was opening the door, prepared to get hit with whatever massive object his partner happened to have on his desk (there were a variety of things, surprisingly), and ready to sit through yet another long lecture about how much of a bum he was and why he never had any money, etc., etc.

In a perfect world... Hisoka would still hurt him. That was just his lot in life- afterlife, rather.

However, when the younger shinigami turned around at his desk to glance at him, his face held no semblance of anger. In fact, his expression was somewhat peaceable and... was that _relief _he was seeing?

"There you are." The boy before him started, emerald eyes shining slightly. Then he paused, and looked his partner up and down. He had noticed the disheveled clothing and pale skin-- among other things. "What the hell happened to you?"

Tsuzuki stared back at him, clueless. "Eh?"

"Why is your hair green?"

He didn't even have to reply as the realization suddenly dawned, and Hisoka turned away. Tsuzuki wandered over and sat down in his own chair, staring down at his desk as if it was the most interesting thing in the known universe.

"You know... he said it would wear off in a few hours..." He commented offhandedly.

Hisoka scoffed at him. "You are such an idiot."

"I didn't want this to happen! And anyway, he said it was just food coloring, and you should have seen me _before_ I got here-"

"No. I meant the fact that you were late."

"That wasn't my fault either!" For some reason, Tsuzuki had the sudden urge to burst into tears. Then he noticed that he was having a lot of urges today.

Hisoka had stopped pretending to work on the papers in front of him and frowned. "What's wrong with you? Today not your day or something?"

All he got was a soft whimper in response.

"Tsuzuki?"

"It... It wasn't even that bad. I just... mooou..."

His partner turned to him, half scowling, but also looking somewhat sympathetic. This was slightly unusual, considering Hisoka rarely ever showed sympathy, much less to Tsuzuki. But then again, stranger things had happened since that fateful night in Kyoto. With all of its raging fire, black omens, and regrets, some good had come of it. Hisoka's kinder and virtually docile behavior, for example. There was no way he could complain about such a thing. Although he still got hit an awful lot...

"Are you... okay?" the boy asked quietly.

Tsuzuki managed a smile, the first one since he'd walked into the office that morning. That _had_ to be a new record of some sort. "I'm fine. I'm just hungry is all."

Hisoka looked faintly puzzled by that remark, but then he nodded slowly, as if to himself. Turning to the side, he reached for one of the drawers in his desk, and upon opening it, pulled out a small blue box with white ribbon wrapped around it. Almost shyly he handed it over to his partner, reddening a little.

Tsuzuki carefully took it from his hands, smile growing wider. Amethyst eyes sparkled with delight and affection as he carefully pulled the binding off of the box and opened it to examine its contents. One glance and he thought he was going to fall over dead from the shock.

"I had some extra time this morning, so I stopped by that one bakery that you like so much, and... Er... is there a problem?" Hisoka blinked at him.

"No no no! They look delicious!" He was already starting to salivate. He set the box down on his desk and promptly began devouring the creme puffs, fully in happy spastic puppy-mode at that point.

The younger shinigami turned to sit back down again, satisfied, but he was suddenly tackled with one massive glomp that sent him flailing backwards and onto the floor. He yelped a little, trying to push Tsuzuki off before the man ended up crushing his rib cage.

"Thank you Thank you Thank you Thank you Thank you Thank you THANK YOU 'SOKA-CHAAAN!"

"You're welcome. Could you please get off?!"

"You have no idea how happy this has made me! I hardly had anything to eat this morning and Terazuma was a total meanie and I was so depressed about it that I couldn't even- OH HISOKA!"

Anymore squeezing and Hisoka would die, he was sure of it. He was probably turning as blue as Tsuzuki's hair... Or was that green? He couldn't tell with the myriad of colors exploding before his eyes.

Tsuzuki, oblivious to his partner's _obvious _discomfort and the fact that his face was turning quite an alarming shade of purple, rambled on and on. By the time he was finished, Hisoka was nothing more than a occasionally twitching blob of flesh, still trying to take a single breath. Tsuzuki removed some of his weight, still grinning and wagging his tail.

"I have to thank you somehow! Oh... I know! I'll treat you to lunch!"

Hisoka sat up slightly, panting hard. "What...? You don't... have any... money!"

"Yeah I do! Enough to take you to your faaaavorite restaurant!"

"You... couldn't afford my... favorite restaurant... even if it was a pay day."

Tsuzuki pouted. "As true as that is... I could probably handle your SECOND favorite! Right? Right?"

"I don't have one..."

"BUT- Nooooo! Hisokaaaa! I have to buy you something!"

Hisoka stared up at him, lips upturned ever so slightly. "You don't have to. It was... a gift."

A gift? The man would have to ponder over that one for a while. He knew it was a gift, but... He looked back at Hisoka, taking in his expression. Hisoka reaffirmed his statement with a short nod, and then... he smiled. Not a huge smile, but simple and altogether charming. It was something he'd never seen before, but hoped to see more of. And Tsuzuki thought his own heart had stopped beating.

Two wonderful surprises in one day made everything else nothing but water under the bridge.

"Tsuzuki?"

He stopped staring and stood, helping his partner off the floor as well. "Lunch it is then."

"Idiot. I'm telling you, you don't have to pay for it. I'll just-"

"I want to though. Even if I have to use up my entire budget for this month!"

Hisoka winced. "Don't do something so stupid."

"Well, let's go!" Tsuzuki made a run for the door.

"But it's not even ten o'clock yet!"

Had this been a perfect world, it would have already been noon, and they could have eaten with no problems. He certainly wouldn't have been stopped by Tatsumi coming to check up on his work output, and then told he wouldn't be able to leave until he finished the previous stack. That required going all the way back to retrieve the lost papers, and having to pass by Watari's doors- which incidentally, had smoking billowing out from the cracks. He wouldn't have passed the still gloating Terazuma on the way and nearly tripped over his own shoe laces when he stopped paying attention to glare at the other man. This was most certainly **not **a perfect world.

But that didn't matter, Tsuzuki decided, when he returned to his office to see Hisoka pulling on his jacket and handing Tsuzuki his trench coat. He was still smiling, telling him that he would leave him there if he didn't hurry up. They had to sneak past Tatsumi, as well as beat the lunch hour rush-- if there would even be one at 10:30 in the morning. In the name of a good meal with his cherished partner, Tsuzuki was more than happy to comply.

Everything was already perfect, just the way it was.

-owari-  
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Please leave a review if you can! Sankyuu!


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